No Spotters Available!

As I write you this I have finished the first can of Questionable Tuna. Sadly, there were no spotters available, so if, perhaps, I were to lose all feeling in my legs, or experience sudden blindness, I would be completely on my own. I wasn't thinking, America, and I will try and always have a spotter with me in the future. Although, awkwardly enough, because of the great risk I am taking, I will never be able to offer the spotter a bite of the same thing I am eating, even though it might look delicious, and they might beg me.

Before you start asking, I heated the tuna in the microwave and it was delicious, spicy and sweet all at the same time. The tuna came out of the can as if it was perfectly okay, all white, solid and albacorey. Just to review, it's white bun, tuna all soaked in NC BBQ sauce, topped with BBQ slaw. That's what you're seeing in the picture.

How does it compare to pulled pork? That is a question I do not feel like answering. Let's just say that the NC BBQ tuna sandwich is a good sandwich.

As for my health, it's only been a few minutes, and except for a tiny amount of pain/tingling in my fingers I feel alright. Full, and ready to face my empty day. My heart rate is up, but I am sure that is just fear, after all, I have just crossed over some mysterious border that I am sure there is no returning from.

I will contact you tomorrow and let you know how I am doing. If you do not hear from me, please contact the Chicken of the Sea people, and tell them my story.

First Can: North Carolina Pulled Pork (Questionable Tuna) Sandwich.

Can One: Best By Aug 20 2009 VAL2E 1ZSWG 10:26

If you’ve lived in the Bay Area for any amount of time, you know that the only place to get a good NC-BBQ’d pulled pork sandwich is either at my apartment or some potluck that I happen to be attending.

Obviously, I can’t tell you how I prepare and pull my own pork. But it doesn’t matter here, because we’re going to substitute the Questionable Tuna for the pork.

I make a delicious NC BBQ sauce, and here, minus the secrets, is my recipe:

Ingredients

2 cups Cider Vinegar

3 tablespoons Ketchup

2 tablespoons Brown Sugar

4 teaspoons Coarse Salt

1 tablespoon Tabasco Sauce or other hot sauce

1 to teaspoons Hot Red Pepper Flakes, or more to taste

1 to teaspoons Black Pepper

http://recipe.aol.com/recipe/north-carolina-vinegar-sauce/74206

The trick is to take the meat, soak/douse, uh, marinate it in the sauce. Put the meat on the cheapest whitest bun you can get your hands on, and then top it off with some NC BBQ slaw. Here’s my recipe, minus the secrets, for the BBQ slaw:

4 c. cabbage, chopped fine

3 Tbsp sugar

1/3 c. Heinz catsup

2 Tbsp white vinegar

1 tsp salt

1/4 tsp black pepper, or to taste

dash (or more) Cayenne

Chop cabbage. Mix other ingredients until dissolved. Add to cabbage--mix well. Cover and refrigerate. Keeps practically forever.

http://hkentcraig.com/BBQrecipes1.html

I've got to go take a shower and buy some buns. I'll be back in a bit to EAT IT! I'm nervous, obviously, but I believe that things are going to be okay...

Can you heat tuna in a microwave? Or should I eat it cold?